Clarity — Say What You Mean
📋 What it is
Editing for clarity fixes sentences that are technically correct but confusing (misplaced words, unclear “it”).
🗣️ Coach says
A sentence can be grammatically fine and still confusing. “I saw the dog running to school” — who was running? BOLT writes tangled sentences — untangle WHO does WHAT.
🧠 Memory hook
Ask: could a reader picture the WRONG thing? If yes, move the words closer to what they describe.
😂 Giggle
Why did the editor bring scissors to the essay?
To cut the wordiness down to size!
😲 Whoa!
A real newspaper once wrote “police found a body in a field belonging to Mr Smith” — the field, not the body!
🖍️ Grade BOLT-3000's edit for clarity.
You're the teacher — mark BOLT-3000's work, then reveal how you did. (Grading a robot: all the skill, none of the sting.)
BOLT wrote: “She fed the cat wearing pyjamas.”
✗ Needs a fix — unclear — the cat isn’t in pyjamas: “Wearing pyjamas, she fed the cat.”
A misplaced phrase makes the cat seem to wear pyjamas; move it beside the real subject.
🧪 Try it! (2 minutes)
Rewrite “Almost frozen, Ben ate the soup” so it’s clear WHO was frozen.